S/S Saturday Selects: The Next Teen Movie Remake

This Saturday’s topic is the next teen movie remake. Everyone’s seen a few of these at least once in their lives. But what if these classics were made in the 21st century? We pick which ones we’d like to get remade:

Sarah’s pick: She’s All That

Oh, Freddie Prinze, Jr. My first celeb crush. I was obsessed with him and it’s all because of this little movie called She’s All That. Did I mention that I watched it about five times in one day? That’s dedication right there. It’s a timeless story of popular guy gets dumped and then makes a bet with annoying friend that he’ll turn any girl into a hottie, popular dude takes the nerdy girl and makes her over (with much resistance, I might add) but falls in love with her in the process, annoying friend messes it up by revealing the secret, nerdy girl and popular guy get in a fight, cue romantic gesture and they make up and end up together forever. THE END.

Forget Twilight and Hunger Games, we gotta show these kids these days what real teen romances are — and they don’t need to involve vampires, werewolves, kids killing kids and especially, virginity. Who can relate to that? If you look back at this teen movie with 21st century eyes, you’ll see it was pretty genius. Here are my favorite parts:

Freddie Prinze, Jr: Duh, I was going to put him in here. Where else will we find a dude who’s Mr. Popular, class president, straight-A student, captain of the soccer team and a sensitive soul at heart?

Makeover scene: Who didn’t love the stairs scene set to “Kiss Me?” Also the future Sookie Stackhouse, Anna Paquin, tweezed the eff out of her eyebrows and put a tight red dress on Rachel Leigh Cook and suddenly Laney Boggs was hot. Oh Sookie.

Usher: Usher plays the school DJ. Sidenote, did anyone out there have a DJ in their high school? I was really disappointed when I found out that I didn’t have my own David Silver at my high school (which was all-girls’ so that made a little more sense.) Usher should still play school DJ in the remake. He hasn’t aged a day.

The ending: Dancing under twinkling lights to “Kiss Me.” So romantic. Why hasn’t this happened to me yet? Plus, Freddie Prinze, Jr. reveals he wants to do performance art. Ohhhh-kay.

I’d love to see this movie get remade. It’s my favorite teen comedy and people need to know how brilliant it is. Can Freddie make a cameo?

Sam’s pick: Some Kind of Wonderful 

I basically already detailed this in another blog, but I’m totally going (late) 80s and choosing Some Kind of Wonderful as the next teen movie that needs to be remade.

Original Premise: Girl best friend loves guy best friend. Both are poor, from the wrong-side-of-the-tracks sort. Guy wants popular girl. Popular girl decides to give him a shot. They like each other, but she realizes she needs to stop relying on guys (what?) and backs out, especially after finding out that the girl best friend is in love with said guy. Guy realizes he loves best friend.

Oh, the romantic hopeful’s Pretty in Pink. Or realist’s Pretty in Pink? Or the holy shit am I the best friend who’s in love with his or her best friend and they better get together….Pretty in Pink? Anyway, tough luck Duckie, Watts played your game – and won.

New premise: Guy (Josh Hutcherson if I had my pick) falls for super-pretty, super-popular girl (Lucy Hale), with the help of BFF (Emma Roberts). (I know what you’re thinking, but let’s get real, the new Watts has to be super pretty too. She could like, cut her hair or wear glasses, as ipso facto that makes for teen movie ugly.) Popular girl ends up falling for him, despite protests from the popular crowd. Guy takes a chance and asks her to prom. She says yes. She then goes with another guy, because SURPRISE she isn’t nice like the audience thought she was. It’s okay though, because BFF is there (and dolled-up) ready to rock out at prom. Kiss. End movie. (Don’t hate me just cause I changed Pretty in Pink’s ending to a more real life scenario).

Seriously though, this is prime material for a teen remake. Let’s get on it. But keep the corny-deliciousness of it. That’s what MAKES the movie.

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